Community – Page 3

5 Rules of Listening for When We Don’t Like What We Hear

1 Comment / forbearance, grandparenting, Maturity, Trials / By teri / August 23, 2022 June 4, 2022 / gracious listener, listening, receiving critisism, taking advice

What?!

My daughter’s new boyfriend decided to T.P. our house. We chuckled at his display of affection, but my teenage daughter’s amusement turned to groans as I delegated the clean-up to her. I suggested she recruit the culprit for help.

It helps to think of unwanted advice and criticism as verbal toilet papering. Well-meaning people toss these words our way to show they care. Unfortunately, we’re more inclined to dodge their comments as if they were sticks and stones. While pranksters squander yards of toilet paper, words are only wasted when they fall on deaf ears.

“The ear that hears the rebukes of life will abide among the wise. Whoever ignores instruction despises himself, but he who listens to reproof gains intelligence.” Proverbs 15:31 – 32. Intelligent people consider even unsolicited advice and warnings.

Rule 1. Listen! Instead of deflecting and rejecting unpleasant counsel, let’s hear and understand. Invite the person into the conversation, like I told my daughter to ask her boyfriend to help her clean up. Take time to understand what the other person meant. Sometimes we misinterpret things. What we heard may not be what they said. Even if we find someone’s advice not applicable to our present situation, we may find it helpful in the future. Listening and learning are marks of wisdom.

Rule 2. Listen in Love! “Owe no one anything except to love one another,” Romans 13:8. When someone comes to us with unwanted words (notice I said when not if because it will happen), we owe it to them to treat them in love. “Love is patient, kind, …is not provoked, thinks no evil,…bears all things” (1Corinthians 13:4,5,7), such as hurtful words and annoying advice. How do we want to be received when we share our thoughts with another? Jesus expects us to receive comments from others the way we want our words received.

Rule 3. Listen with Gratitude! “Open rebuke is better than love carefully concealed. Faithful are the wounds of a friend,” Proverbs 27: 5, 6. With friends like that, who needs enemies, right? Wrong! Enemies don’t care. Enemies won’t bother with you. They want to see us fail. The rest of Proverbs 27:6 says, “But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” People who tell us we’re fine when we’re not or have an idea how to remedy our problem but don’t tell us are not helpful. Wouldn’t you rather have someone try to help and fail than fail even to try? Be thankful for people who care enough to say something, even if it is the wrong thing.

Rule 4. Listen in Humility! I touched on this in the first rule, but it bears deeper consideration. “Hurt does not equal harm” (source unknown). As we read in Proverb 27, wounds from a friend are faithful, not fatal. I know that when my feelings are hurt, it’s usually because my pride is injured. When my feathers get ruffled, I need to pluck them off.

The adage “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me,” was taught to children so that they would learn that being hurt by words is a choice. We can choose not to take offense. We can choose to disregard insults. We can choose to overlook a person’s clumsy attempts to be helpful. But these choices require humility.

Truth spoken in love can hurt. Being told we’re wrong hurts, but pain that prompts us to repent promotes healing. “Yes, all of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with humility, for “God… gives grace to the humble.” 1Peter 5:5

Rule 5. Listen as a Steward! What do we do with these unpleasant words? We own them for God’s glory. Let’s pray through unwanted words and ask God to show us if there’s any truth in them. Digesting unwanted words in prayer is a lot like eating chicken. Thank God for His provision, then chew the meat and spit out the bones. Like poultry feeds our bodies, listening prayerfully to unwanted counsel will nourish our souls. It may be that the person who spoke to us is God’s messenger, after all.

The Testimony of Sacred Similarities and Divine Differences

celebrations, Community, Faith, Family Life, Knowing God, Maturity / By teri / August 9, 2022 April 21, 2022 / antiracism, Beautiful Community, Junetheenth, sinful white supremacy, superiority sins

Aspiring to Beautiful Community

Happy Juneteenth!

Comparisons spill out when we welcome a new family member. “Look, she has her mama’s eyes.” “I see her daddy’s dimpled cheeks.” “She has Aunt Jenny’s red hair.” We search those precious newborns for family resemblance. We. Just. Do.

Last year my oldest daughter gave birth to her fifth; my youngest daughter welcomed her first. Yeah! Two new grandbabies for me! The babies were born three weeks apart. Both baby girls weighed the same. Dark hair covered both heads, and both babies have a raspberry birthmark on their backsides (not the same spot but the same size). I call them identical cousins, but they aren’t.

They differ in several ways: eye color, activity level, even their reaction to a dirty diaper. God wove these similarities and differences into my granddaughters just as He does the whole human family.

Back in the ‘90s, I watched Arsenio Hall’s T.V. show. His facial expressions and jawline mesmerized me because these features reminded me of a friend from high school. Yet, Arsenio is African-American, and my friend descended from Irish stock. Despite their contrasting hair and skin tones, their similar facial features reveal their connection. Physical similarities that ignore geopolitical boundaries confirm our sacred union as one human family. We all bleed red. We all need love. We all descended from Adam.

God creates each of us in His image. Reflecting His multi-faceted majesty requires infinite diversity; hence, human diversity is divine. God diversified languages to force people to populate the whole world.

God’s judgment at Babel drove people to migrate across the globe (Genesis 11). Different weather conditions and food supplies began to shape different cultures. Adaptation transformed the physical features of people in varying regions. Unfortunately, humanity is a sinful race.

We constructed class and racial systems to claim superiority and oppress other people groups. We deny the truth with these false contrivances; God created all people in His image. The grievous sins of classism, racism and ethnic supremacy grieve God. Jesus calls us out of that darkness.

“There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” Galatians 3:38

In the proceeding passage, Paul acknowledges our differences and establishes our value. No one is less than human in Jesus’s eyes.

As followers of Christ, we witness God drawing people from every tribe, tongue, and nation. But do we embrace the diversity of those cultures? Pastor Irwyn L. Ince Jr. shows us how it’s done in his brilliant book The Beautiful Community.

I traveled through Ethiopia, visiting churches. A remarkable transformation in their worship occurred when a Marxist regime expelled foreign missionaries in the ‘70s. Without the influence of westerners, the Ethiopian churches cultivated their own style of worship.

I enjoyed listening to drums and the lilting of women praising God. The women often keep time with the music by stomping their feet and rocking their hands back and forth as though they held precious truths. I felt compelled with joy to join in the lilting during one service. Dark, smiling faces turned toward me. They had never heard a white woman lilt, but they seemed pleased that I did. By embracing their form of worship, I embraced them. With their smiles, they welcomed me.

“In order to be in community, we have to experience belonging, a sense of being at home.” Irwyn L. Ince Jr. The beautiful Community (page 84). My Ethiopian brothers and sisters made me feel at home.

How well do we welcome minorities in our local churches? “It is the church’s job to find ways to affirm the full humanity–the royal dignity–of all people, especially those others are inclined to despise.” (Irwyn L. Ince Jr.). Let’s be mindful to include, rather than ignore, minorities in our midst. We need to be mindful of what Pastor Ince calls “minority fatigue.” Let’s love minorities by extending hospitality; let’s show interest in them by asking about their culture. By reaching out, we set the stage for a beautiful community—a foretaste of Christ’s coming Kingdom.

How to Raise a Friend

Community, Family Life, friendship, Motherhood / By teri / July 26, 2022 June 4, 2022 / daughters, friendship with children, mother daughter relationship, National Friendship Day

The National Friendship Day 2022 is on August 7th

My heart aches for moms and daughters who are estranged. How can I help prevent this? What encouragement can I share with young moms so they will enjoy friendships with their children when they’re grown? I decided to ask the experts: three of my closest friends who happen to be my daughters. “What did I do as a parent that paved the way for the close relationships we enjoy today?”

Know the Goal

Anna, my youngest daughter (she’s a new mom), responded first. “When we were adolescents, you told us that you were raising adults, not children.”

Young mom, begin with the end in mind.

Our job is to work ourselves out of a job. We must prepare our offspring to become responsible adults. Grownups should get up and go to work—on their own—understand how to manage money, be good citizens, and someday good parents for our grandchildren.

As moms of infants and toddlers, we spend so much time keeping them close, not letting them out of our sight. It’s easy to forget that, at some point, we need to let them run ahead without us. Hovering too close, like a helicopter, whips a lot of wind. That force either pushes children away or beats them down. Moms, let’s give them the space and lift they need to launch.

Teach children to do things for themselves. One of my favorite mom moments was a phone call from daughter number two at the end of her first year of college. “Mom, I’m so glad you made me learn to do things for myself! I’ve spent all week helping girls who have no clue how to do anything for themselves.” The college she chose was 3,000 miles from home. Before she left, I walked Jenni through making plane reservations and helped her decide what to bring and how to pack everything. She already knew how to navigate an airport. When we flew together as a family, I’d point out how to read arrival and departure boards. Our job is to teach them to leave.

Anna also said, “You gave us bumpers and a wide lane.” Godly parents set boundaries that leave room for children to fail. Choices have consequences. If we create a narrow rut by always choosing for them, children won’t learn how to choose. They need a wide lane.

Boundaries serve to keep children from fatal harm, not failure. Let your kid forget their coat or shoes once in a while. I know a mom who made her forgetful, barefoot child use his allowance to buy flip-flops instead of a new toy. Failure is not an enemy; failure is a teacher.

Insulating children from the consequences of their choices disables them. Children need boundaries enforced, and enforcers are rarely popular. Let your kids take a low or failing grade on an exam. Let them forget to do a chore. Instead of nagging, let them feel the sting of laziness as they hit the bumper of working to bring that grade up or lose a privilege. Bumpers keep kids out of the gutters. My friend used to say, “I spank my kids so society doesn’t have to.” Sometimes you have to be the joy-killer to be a good parent. Raising happy children may be the world’s goal, but it’s not the goal of godly parents.

“I hate you!” screamed each of my children more than once. I’d always reply, “I still love you, and you still need to obey.” When my children balked at consequences, I reminded them, “The goal of all discipline is self-discipline. If you don’t want (fill in the blank: time out, a spanking, grounding), then don’t disobey.”

If you want your children to be your friends as adults, quit trying to be their best buddy before they grow up. Parent your children while they’re young, so they can grow into adults who choose to be your friends. Keep in mind that a vital part of this is being present for your children.

Be Present and Available

More important than being popular with your kids is being present. My oldest daughter, Rachel, said, “You were always around and willing to hang out.” You can’t develop a relationship with someone if you don’t spend time with them. Hurry consumes far too much family time. We rush our kids from one activity to another, packing the calendar with events and obligations. As a result of providing opportunities—some for them, some for us—we crowd out room to rest, to just be together.

Doing nothing is essential; God ordained Sabbath.

It refreshes our patience with our children. We can welcome their interruptions and invite them into our work, so they’re learning new skills.

A neighborhood girl was a frequent visitor to our home. One day as she helped me garden, she said, “My mom’s always on the computer. I’m glad you let me come be with you.” Being present for my children made me available to other kids in my neighborhood. Oh, young mamas, please come home if you can. Our communities are falling apart without adult supervision. Your children will grow and go. Many. Meaningful. Moments. It’s the 3M tape that sticks hearts together.

Be Interested in Who They Are

It’s hard to like someone who isn’t interested in you. When I held my first baby, I wondered, “Who is this little person?” I studied each child the Lord entrusted to my care. That pursuit paid off. My middle daughter, Jenni, said, “You took interest and gave constructive criticism to my artistic pursuits.”

I also noticed the first time Jenni counted blocks at six months old. Before she knew the names of the numbers, Jenni knew precisely how many blocks the four-year-old had stolen off her walker tray. She hollered until the thief restored all four blocks. After earning a bachelor’s in accounting, Jenni became a lawyer. Today, she’s a major law firm partner, wheeling and dealing big money. Art provides her with relaxation. We love strolling art museums together.

I also spent hours reading to daughter number one, the bookworm. Today Rachel’s a present homeschool mom providing classical education for her five children. She and I both write. We exchange books and discuss what we’re learning together.

I cheered from the sidelines, encouraging my youngest, Anna, the athlete, to climb higher, run faster, and flip further. The daughter who appreciated my “wide lanes and bumpers” serves as a State Trooper.

Anna entered the academy, meeting the male fitness requirements! We love taking walks when we’re together. Lately, we visit a lot on FaceTime, discussing the challenges of a new baby.

These women are my heroes. I never imposed my dreams on them. I let my daughters be dreamers. Together we discovered who God intended them to be. And I’m very thankful they each choose to be my friend.

Four Ways to Reclaim God’s Feast, Shavuot, and the Reason We Should

celebrations, Community / By teri / May 31, 2022 February 24, 2022 / Jesus, Law Fulfilled, Messiah, Pentecost, Ruth, Shavuot

Mark June 5th on your calendar!

Yesterday we celebrated Memorial Day in America. Yet, a day of even greater importance—eternal significance—is just five days away. Can you guess what it is?

Pentecost! This celebration originated as the Jewish feast Shavuot, also known as the Feast of First Fruits. Its eternal fulfillment occurred when the Holy Spirit descended on the church—the first fruits of God’s Kingdom.

Only Shavuot is celebrated with fluffy, leavened bread. Leaven represents sin in Scripture; both leaven and pride puff things up. The two leavened loaves of bread waved before the Lord at Shavuot foreshadowed two sinful peoples—Jews and Gentiles—coming together in the Kingdom of God.

The Jews celebrate the giving of God’s Law to Moses on Shavuot, as many sects of Christianity celebrate the giving of God’s Spirit—the writing of the Law on our hearts (Ezekiel 36:24-27).

The Law calls Shavuot the feast of weeks, celebrated seven Sabbaths after the last Sabbath of Passover (forty-nine days plus one). Another tradition that the Jews adopted during this feast was the reading of the book of Ruth.

The book of Ruth records Ruth’s faithfulness to her Hebrew mother-in-law, Naomi, and their return from Moab to Bethlehem, the House of Bread. Ruth is a Moabite—a Gentile. The Jews read this book because the story takes place during the harvest of First Fruits. But the veil over Jewish eyes has blinded them to the greater message of the book.

This tiny story ebbs and flows with massive Messianic undercurrents. The book of Ruth establishes the linage of King David (the Messianic line). The story hints at two other Gentile women in David’s family, Tamar (mother of Perez whom she bore to Judah) and Rahab (Boaz’s mother who hid the Israelite spies in Jericho and joined the nation of God’s chosen people). Matthew names all three of these women in the genealogy of Jesus (Matthew 1:1-6). The central theme of Ruth is redemption which is also the primary mission of Yeshua Ah Messiah—Jesus the Christ.

While many liturgical Christian churches still celebrate Pentecost (the fiftieth day after the feast of unleavened bread following Passover), this day feels forgotten in evangelical circles. “In many evangelical churches in the United States, the secular holiday, Mother’s Day, maybe more celebrated than the ancient and biblical feast of Pentecost.” (from Wikipedia’s article on Pentecost). What might we be missing out on? His annual feasts for Israel foreshadow His redemptive work through time.

At the first Pentecost, a Jewish band of disciples gathered in the upper room. They embraced Jesus as their Messiah; yet, they failed to see the symbolism of the wave offering of bread. Eventually, Peter went to Cornelius’s house and witnessed the Holy Spirit come upon these Gentile believers. God revealed the mystery of the two leaven loaves.

How might we, as Gentile believers, grafted into the people of God, remember the fulfillment of this solemn feast? As lovely as some of the liturgical traditions are, I feel these fail to embrace God’s heart for the redemption of Israel. The Apostle Paul expresses his heart for Israel in his letter to the predominantly Gentile church in Rome.

“Brethren, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for Israel is that they may be saved.” Romans 10:1

Jewish people need the Gospel. A great way to celebrate Pentecost is to pray for Israel. Ask God to rescue the Jewish people from trusting in their righteousness and receive, by faith, the redemption of Messiah (Romans 10:2-4). Pray they hear the Gospel as they read the book of Ruth.
Read the book of Ruth. It only takes about twenty minutes, and it’s a riveting story (My granddaughter loves it when I read Ruth to her!). Ask God to open your eyes to the beauty of His redemptive work.
Be grateful we were grafted into God’s Kingdom. God, in a sense, baked us together with the Jews—like the loaves of Shavuot—two sinful peoples joined for His glory (Romans 11:23-24). Pentecost should be a day of thanksgiving for the harvest of the First Fruits. That’s us, His church!
Taste and see the Lord is good. A delicious way to celebrate would be baking two loaves of bread. If you want to get fancy, you could branch the loaves together with a dove-shaped piece of dough as a symbol of the Holy Spirit. As you enjoy this treat, explain the importance of this day to your children and grandchildren and any guests you may invite to celebrate with you.

Sisters, let’s reclaim the wonder of God’s festival and celebrate Pentecost, a memorial day far better than one that just passed.

Shalom!

Easter Every Day?

2 Comments / celebrations, Community, Faith / By teri / April 19, 2022 February 28, 2022 / Holy Spirit filled, It's still Easter!, resurrection

We’ve got the power!

The children’s story, Christmas Every Day, chronicles the saga of a little girl who asked Santa to make every day Christmas for a whole year. Santa Claus indulges her by making her dream of 365 days of candy and presents come true. Within a week, the little girl regrets her greed as her family and most others are impoverished by gift-giving and feel ill from gluttony. Everyone ends up cranky. Finally, the year ends, and so do the celebrations. Everyone dances with joy. Then the girl sticks her foot in the other ditch asking Santa to never, ever have another Christmas. This time the jolly old elf does not indulge her, and everyone lives happily ever after with an annual celebration.

I love holidays and traditions. Easter is my favorite for many reasons; warmer weather, spring flowers popping up, cheery pastel decorations, cute, cuddly animal decorations, and most of all, Christ’s victory over the grave. Now, I must wait again for the year to pass for Easter to come again. Or do I?

As a follower of Jesus, I can celebrate the resurrection every day. I don’t need egg decorating and hunts, sunrise services, or chocolate bunnies to appreciate Easter. Who needs a bunny when we have Jesus? Christ lives! And He lives in us.

“I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.” Galatians 2:20

The verse above implies we should remember Good Friday daily; the following passage encourages us to make every day a step-by-step resurrection celebration.

“Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.” Romans 6:4

If we mindfully walked in the power of the Spirit Who raised Jesus from the dead, imagine the positive impact on the world around us.

In the sermon on the mount, Jesus told His disciples to let their light shine among men. He’s calling us to live out the Sonrise life with Holy Spirit power. Jesus invites us to Easter every day. And I don’t think He’d mind if we ate a chocolate egg or two. Better yet, sharing those leftover sweets wrapped in shiny, pastel foil may be enough to brighten up someone’s day.

easter, easter decoration, eggs-4014374.jpg

Happy Easter, again! He has risen!

(If you know the traditional response, leave it in a comment.)

An Important Life Lesson from Spring Flowers

Community, Faith, Maturity / By teri / March 22, 2022 February 26, 2022 / church life, gardening, generations, mentoring, teaching

Don’t cut the greens!

As March commences, one of my favorite flowers struggles to break through the cold earth. Soon after the crocuses pop up through the snow, daffodils take their place as the trumpet section in the parade of spring bulbs. I marvel at their bright blast of sunshine. These cheery plants announce God’s kept promise of resurrection life. But all too soon, their blooms wither, leaving behind straggly greens. Now what’s a gardener to do?

The first year daffodils grew in my yard, I made a rookie mistake and cut those leftover leaves. Then an older sister in Christ with far more gardening experience pointed out my folly, “Those leaves fuel the bulb to flower next year. When you cut them off, you rob yourself of future blooms.”

Oops! I learned to leave and appreciate those withering greens. Years later, I see a similar lesson for us as Christian women. Because now, I’m the straggling greenery past the prime of flowering. My blooms have grown. The petals scattered in the wind as my children have long left the stem of a home I provided. Younger sisters, please, don’t cut off the voices of experience. Older women are a gift of God to you. Our years of child-rearing and homemaking, and yes, even gardening, provide nourishment to help you thrive.

Unfortunately, women act a bit too much like bulbs. We gather more often in peer groups than in multi-generational settings. Peers do have their place, but God intends His daughters to live and grow through the process of the older teaching the younger.

“The older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things—that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” Titus 2:3-5

Together we face the challenge of reaching out and embracing one another. Too often, we cut one another off through criticism instead of spurring each other on through encouragement (Hebrews 10:24). So, what needs to happen to cultivate a healthy flowerbed in the family of God?

First, it starts with us older women being reverent. Our worship must be more than weekly church attendance. We need to worship daily. Moment by moment, we let God open our eyes to His wonders and praise Him. We must live in the hush of holiness—a contented, consecrated life of obedience. Second, older women must refrain from bad-mouthing others, particularly the young. We need to sing their new songs with our seasoned passion if we desire to impart the grace and knowledge of Jesus in their lives. Third, we value our sobriety and resist the temptation to overmedicate the physical pains of an aging body. When Paul wrote to Titus centuries ago, the painkiller of choice was wine; today, it’s opioids. The epidemic of opioid addiction, even among the young, shocks me! With my achy joints and sleepless nights, I understand the temptation. As God’s mature daughters, we must resist the temptation of inebriation. Then our lives will glorify the God Who renews us even while our bodies go to seed.

“Therefore, we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day.”

2 Corinthians 4:16

Finally, God appoints the responsibility of teaching the younger women to us older sisters. We must be the bridge builders, the initiators. Not in a structured unnatural way, but in a caring communal way, we come alongside and get involved with the generation coming behind us.

Younger sister, Paul’s letter to Pastor Titus also speaks to you. Look for those reverent, sober, discreet women. Spend time with them. Seek their input. Please, don’t cut the greens. God lets older growth tarry for a reason. Absorb the nourishment we bring to His flower bed of saints.

What do Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky and Saint Patrick have in Common?

1 Comment / celebrations, Faith, Spiritual warfare / By teri / March 8, 2022 March 2, 2022 / courage, legends, St. Patrick, St. Patrick's Day, the Gospel, Volodymyr Zelensky

Legendary Courage!

As war rages in Ukraine, it’s business as usual in America. On St. Patrick’s day. Parades will march through our streets with marching bands and shamrock-covered floats. I predict many will wear blue and yellow armbands to support Ukraine. Who knows, maybe in Chicago, they’ll dye the river yellow and blue and watch it turn green? Then, the bars will fill in the evening, and glasses will be raised to Zelensky, toasting his courage as the usual drunken debauchery unfolds. This kind of celebration is not what Patrick envisioned when he left Britain and returned to Ireland.

Irish slave traders kidnapped Patrick (born a free Roman citizen) from his homeland in Britain when he was seventeen. He was one of few who escaped this fate. After returning to Britain, he came to saving faith. He returned to Ireland with a burning desire to see God transform the heart of the Irish people. His courage stands as an example to us today.

“It was not by my own grace, but God who overcame it in me, and resisted them all so that I could come to the peoples of Ireland to preach the gospel. I bore insults from unbelievers, so that I would hear the hatred directed at me for traveling here. I bore many persecutions, even chains, so that I could give up my freeborn state for the sake of others. If I be worthy, I am ready even to give up my life most willingly here and now for his name. It is there that I wish to spend my life until I die, if the Lord should grant it to me.” from Saint Patrick’s Confessio

As Zelensky stands against Putin, he understands the cost. Patrick understood the cost of returning to Ireland. Are we willing to lay down our lives for something greater than pleasure and comfort? Is the freedom the Gospel brings worthy of our sacrifice?

Yes! But will we count the cost?

Real courage isn’t rhetoric. It’s easy to imagine what we would say or do in dangerous circumstances. I waste a lot of time daydreaming like that. Yet, we shy away from sharing Christ because we don’t want to offend people. That’s like failing to do CPR on a person who passes out in front of us for fear of being sued. If we can save lives, shouldn’t we?

Courage shows up in hard places; we choose bravery, or we don’t. Many around us will head to the bar on St. Patrick’s Day. Before that happens, let’s ask them a bold question, “What do you know about St. Patrick?” Then let’s be bolder yet and thrust the sword of the Spirit—the Word of God—into the conversation. It doesn’t matter if they don’t believe the Bible is God’s truth. As a wise old pastor once said, “poke ‘em with it anyway!”

Remember Saint Patrick!

Humili*tea

1 Comment / celebrations, prayer, Teatime Qualities / By teri / February 22, 2022 February 28, 2022 / Be Humble Day, George Washington, humility, Pride

Welcome to Teatime

Tea Time is a quarterly (February, May, August, and November) reflection on various qualties.

hu*mil*i*Tea /(h)yo͞oˈmilədē/ noun: 1. a modest opinion of one’s own importance, 2. an absence of pride or self-assertion, 3. To accept, with gratitude, a cup of coffee when you’d prefer tea.

Did you know today, February 22^nd is national “Be Humble Day” and the birthday of the first president of the U.S.? I wonder if the anonymous founder of “Be Humble Day” chose George Washington’s birthday on purpose? (Google didn’t know either.)

I think Washington would count it an honor to have his birthday celebrated by acts of humility—a day to refrain from boasting and acknowledge our mistakes and flaws. In the spirit of “Be Humble Day.”

When I was a child, I enjoyed two days off from school in February: the 12^thand the 22^nd. However, in 1968, when I was a wee second-grader, Uncle Sam stole candy from this baby by rolling the two days into one—Presidents Day—a day to remember not only Washington and Lincoln but all who’ve taken the solemn oath of office. This act of congress took the limelight off Washington’s accomplishments and celebrated each person who served our country as commander-and-chief. Washington would approve, no doubt, but he wasn’t always that humble.

Historians note that young Washington displayed arrogance and excessive ambition. But General Washington resigned his commission as a changed man. War taught him to put others first—a lesson to master if we want to leave this world better than we found it.

george washington, president, portrait-4897252.jpg

“How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these.” ~ George Washington

Humility enjoys the freedom of transparency; pride protects self with deception. The humble confess transgressions, receive forgiveness, and gain confidence in the work and worth God bestows upon him. In contrast, the arrogant hide failure and inflate successes. Our Creator gifts us with talents, abilities, and resources to be used for the good of others and the glory of God.

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself; it’s thinking of yourself less.” ~ C. S. Lewis

As the newly formed government considered a title for its first leader, Vice President Adams suggested the following: “His Elective Majesty,” “His Mightiness,” and even “His Highness, the President of the United States of America and the Protector of their Liberties.”

However, Washington rejected these inflated perceptions of a head-of-state. They had just won a revolution against a king who claimed divine anointing. While God raises leaders, He also removes those that think too highly of themselves and fail to give Him glory—Nebuchadnezzar being a prime example (Daniel 4:30-33).

Washington understood the title he chose would set both the tone of his leadership and precedence for his successors. He suggested, and the House adopted, the title “The President of the United States,” accepting the simple address, “Mr. President.”

I shuddered at the phrase “under my reign” (instead of administration) as I listened to recent presidential debates. Sorry boys and girls, there’s no such thing as King of America! It’s lamentable that few modern-day presidents display the same humility as George Washington.

Putting politics aside, might celebrating “Be Humble Day” help repair the political and cultural rifts in our nation and the world? The best place to start is on our knees with honest confessions. For example, do we speak disrespectfully about the authorities God placed over us or fail to pray for them? Ouch! I plead guilty. Then our hearts will be ready to pray and thank God for those who serve our nation.

Jesus challenges us to be humble every day, not just on February 22^nd. What might happen if we all accept His mandate, “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” Philippians 2:3-4

Lord, please deliver us from delusions of grandeur. Help us reflect the humility of Jesus, Who came not to be served but to serve by laying aside His glory and laying His life down for others. Amen

ith gratitude, a cup of coffee when you’d prefer tea (or vice versa).

Three Ways to Love in the Fourth-Dimension

Community, Faith, Family Life, Knowing God, Maturity, prayer / By teri / February 8, 2022 December 14, 2021 / Love

For God so Loved!

Sparkling, paper hearts sprang up as I opened a Valentine. Pop-up cards delight me. I love to shop for them, make them, and send them to my friends and family. These whimsical treasures express a three-D love in a material world. Yet, pop-ups hint at the kind of love the apostle Paul describes in Ephesians, “that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height— to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge.” (Ephesians 3:17b-19a). Four dimensions! The cover of a pop-up card hides a central aspect of the message. Today I want to open up a hidden face of love—the unseen work it does for others.

The Bible opens our understanding of the unseen ways Jesus loves us right now, today. Here are three demonstrations of Christ loving us in the fourth dimension.

Offensively

In the book of Romans chapter eight, Paul explains that Christ sits at the right hand of God and intercedes for us. Jesus prays for us! He sees our hearts, our struggles, the ways Satan tries to block our goal of Christ-likeness. Then He lifts His hands to the Father, showing His the scars that ensure our victory.

So, what does our prayer life reveal about our love? Do we intercede for others? Are we mindful of their struggles, circumstances, and needs? I fear too often our prayers tend to be selfish, focused on what affects us. How often do we pray for the homeless we pass on the streets or our brothers and sisters who face severe persecution for their faith? Do we pray for our enemies? The Lord expects us to (Matthew 5:44)

Defensively

The book of Job provides a peek into the battle going on around us, exposing Satan’s ugly heart as he maligns both God’s and Job’s character (Job 1:9-11). To this day, the vile, jealous creature constantly accuses God’s saints (Revelation 12:10; “day and night,” according to this passage. But God (two of my favorite words in the Bible) preserves His saints. He defends our righteous standing before Him. The dignity He bestowed on us by grace can never be defamed. The world slings mud at us in vain.

If God so loves us when we aren’t looking, how well do we love one another? My favorite line from the song They Will Know We Are Christians by Our Love” states, “We will guard each one’s dignity and save each one’s pride.” Do we? Or do we have dirty hands from belittling others behind their backs?

Immensely

In the first scene of Job, we also hear God brag about His “servant Job.” Did you know God brags about His children.? What good parent doesn’t? The apostle John sums it up well, “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.” 3 John 1:14. If it makes John happy, how much greater must our Abba’s joy be.

Do we brag about the good things other people do? I tend to brag about my accomplishments. I bait the hook, fishing for praise. I’m working on practicing the wisdom of, “Let another man praise you, and not your own mouth, “ Proverbs 27:2. Next time we’re tempted to show off, let’s secretly love another and talk about the beauty they bring to the world.

The most significant love test is anonymity; how do I love when no one looks? Yet, if we only love by unseen methods, we love one-dimensionally—flatter than flat. All dimensions need to be present, our words, our actions, our presence, along with our anonymous contributions to the wellbeing of others. All four-dimension complete a perfect love.

I want to celebrate this Valentine’s Day, not just in tangible ways, but by committing to loving others offensively, defensively, and immensely behind their backs. Will you join me in displaying the fourth dimension of God’s great love for us?

Honoring Survivors: This Veteran’s Day, how will we honor those who served us?

celebrations, Community / By teri / November 2, 2021 August 18, 2021 / gratitude, military, service, Veterans Day

Let’s Remember

My husband watched in shock as Afghan allies clung to the sides of U.S. aircraft, hoping to escape the Taliban take-over. He cringed as some fell to their death on the abandoned tarmac. And he was not alone.

(William Gasser, U.S. Navy and Marines 1974-2017. Thanks for serving, Sweetheart!)

Thousands of U.S. troops spent time in Afghanistan fighting the war on terror. My husband spent just nine months there. He came home physically unharmed—but mentally, he formed an attachment to the people and their need for a stable government and freedom. For many U.S. veterans who fought in that nation, the debacle of that exit feels like a defeat. The same failure our Veterans from Vietnam and Korea felt. These men and women faithfully obeyed when duty called. They are not losers.

(David Donaldson, Vietnam veteran U.S. Navy 1957-1977. Thanks, Daddy!)

The responsibility to honor their sacrifice and courage rests on our shoulders.

“Whereas the first nationwide observance of Veterans Day was on November 11, 1954: Now, therefore, be it Resolved by the House of Representatives (the Senate concurring), That Congress hereby— (1) encourages Americans to demonstrate their support for veterans on Veterans’ Day by treating that day as a special day of remembrance;” (117 STAT. 2958 CONCURRENT RESOLUTIONS—OCTOBER 31, 2003).

According to the Department of Veterans Affairs data, around 19 million U.S. veterans populate these great United States. That’s close to one in ten adults.

Janet Manseau U.S. Army 1955-1957 Thanks, Mom!

18.2 million living veterans served during at least one war as of 2018.
9% of veterans are women.
7 million veterans served during the Vietnam War.
3 million veterans have served in support of the War on Terrorism.
Of the 16 million Americans who served during World War II, about 325,000 were still alive as of 2020.
2 million veterans served during the Korean War.

(The sailor in the middle is Jonathan Gasser. Currently serving in the Navy. Thanks, Son!)

As followers of Jesus, we not only have a national responsibility to give honor to who honor is due (Romans 13:7), we must also be mindful of Kingdom soldiers suffering for their faith.

“Remember the prisoners as if chained with them—those who are mistreated—since you

yourselves are in the body also.” Hebrews 13:3

A map from the Voice of the Martyrs hangs in my study. The band of blackened countries representing nations where the Christian faith is illegal reveals an ominous reality. Among those nations lies North Korea (a war the U.S. lost), Vietnam (another failed military action), and most Middle Eastern countries. The other surprising fact is that many of those middle eastern countries once housed the infant church of the first century.

(Thank you, Jesus, that you are building your kingdom and the gates of hell will not prevail!)

Jesus asks us a poignant question, “when the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on the earth?” (Luke 18:8).

Today by faith, let us remember not only American veterans; let us pray for our brothers and sisters worldwide who lay down their lives for the One who died for them. Those Kingdom veterans storming the gates of hell to recuse those lost in darkness need our prayer support as much as our U.S. troops need to be honored.

Here are a few ideas of what we can do:

Write a thank-you note to veterans you know personally.
Attend a parade
If you home school, teach about the founding of Veteran’s Day earlier in the week, make the 11th a day to remember for your students.
If you send your kids to public school, you can pull them out for a special day of homeschooling and take them to a parade.
Post a “thank you for your service; you are not forgotten” banner in your front yard.
Set aside a meal and spend that time fasting and praying for persecuted Christians.

These dark days—filled with wars and rumors of war—will end. Soon our King of Kings will come, and a glorious day of freedom will dawn. Until that day, let’s shine in this darkness by sharing our gratitude and concern for all the veterans.