need vs. want

The U.S. Sun reports parents will spend a jaw-dropping $843 per child on back-to-school purchases in 2021. Twenty years ago, when my children were in school, the average hovered at $527. This year’s projection exceeds the inflation rate by almost $35. Thirty percent of families incur debt to pay for their kids to go back to school.

“The borrower is the slave of the lender.” Proverbs 22:7b

Please, avoid this unnecessary slavery. Trust me, if these figures revealed necessity (instead of excess), every retailer in America would go out of business. The back-to-school season provides rich soil to grow in our understanding of needs and wants.

I remember long supply lists, shopping crowded sales floors for the annual bargains, and children begging for the coolest and best. The couple years I spent homeschooling also posed a challenging back-to-school ritual: ordering curriculum, lesson planning, and still braving frenzied crowds for cheap (while they lasted) school supplies.

Gazing even further through the haze of back-to-school days, I remember the thrill of new clothes and the excitement of picking the grooviest outfit to wear on my first day. A fresh box of crayons thrilled my elementary soul and holding sharp, new pencils with erasers (my stubs of usable graphite always lasted longer than the coveted pink rubber end). How wonderful!

My mom worked to escape the poverty of her youth. As a former have not, she made sure I had it all. I wanted for nothing. And still, I wanted more. I’m not the only coveter. Coveting—the desire to acquire—defines American culture (hence, our national debt).

Most U. S. children expect to show up on that first day of class wearing new stylish clothes, with a new backpack filled with new supplies slung over their shoulder. And U.S. parents happily accept the challenge of fulfilling those expectations by expecting a large credit card bill in September.  That’s how I grew up. But Jesus saved me from these ridiculous expectations. So that’s not how I raised my children.

When the back-to-school season came around, we gathered the backpacks and inspected them for wear. If they were still useable, with no torn seams or gaping holes, then my children would show up with old gear on the first day—and every day after until need arose. We reused scissors and any other supplies that didn’t need replacing. I think my children only got about two pairs of scissors during their education; a blunt tip when they were young and a sharp pair when they grew responsible, and some probably got hand-me-down scissors.

We evaluated wardrobes too. I allowed the purchase of one new outfit before school to wear the first day, not a need but a privilege we could afford (without debt)—and I stressed to them it was a privilege. Even if my kids needed more clothes, I made my kids wait until they saw what their friends wore. This practice spared buyers remorse like my husband experienced in seventh grade. While school shopping, his mom asked if he wanted black or white socks. “I don’t know, white, I guess.”

His choice proved devastating when every other boy in his class returned to school with black socks. He complained. Kudos to my mother-in-law! She made him live with his choice. And he learned to survive peer pressure.

I avoided those tragic (for children) experiences and annoying (for me) complaints by letting them check out the fashion scene before shopping for new clothing.

By the time my kids hit junior high, I allotted them a reasonable budget based on the cost of the necessary merchandise and what our family could afford. I stressed fair isn’t always equal. If one child needed new everything and another required only a few, guess who received less to spend. Kids need suitable lessons on sound economics more than they need new stuff. So, do I, for that matter.

Today I find myself in a back-to-school season. My Teacher, Jesus, reminds me that I am only a steward of the allowance God provides for me. The abundance of my income isn’t for my pursuit of pleasure or new shiny treasure.

“She who lives in pleasure is dead while she lives,” 1Timothy 5:6.

Sometimes I feel like I’m dying—buried under the burden of stuff. Decluttering, organizing, trying to find things—these all consume too much of my time and rob my peace. Can you relate?

“But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content.” 1 Timothy 6:6-8

God expects His children with extra to share with those who lack. How and with whom should I be more generous? The Father puts family first. We start by sharing with those in church. Then we give to the poor of the world.
“But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?” 1 John 3:17

It’s easy to overlook the poor in America. My neighbors appear to live as well as me. Lord, you’ve given me more than I need, thank You. Who needs my excess? Where are the poor? Please open my eyes, Jesus; take me back to school.